If you saw my birthday cake video on Instagram or TikTok, this is the story behind it. Every year, I make my own birthday cake. This tradition that started out of practicality as a simple gluten-free workaround is now deeply personal and one of my favorite rituals: something grounding, joyful, and just a little bit magical.
There’s no official recipe – just a gluten-free yellow cake mix from Whole Foods, a packet of chocolate pudding mix, a spoonful of cocoa powder, and an unmeasured amount of dark red food coloring until it turns into a rich, dense red velvet cake.
It started as both a perfectionist thing and a value thing. I hate to say it, but gluten-free bakery cakes are expensive, often tiny, and not always good. I realized I could make one that tasted better and cost less, and over time, it became my favorite birthday tradition.
How This All Started
When I was a kid, I always asked for key lime pie cheesecake on my birthday—something I regret now. I thought it sounded sophisticated, but really I just wanted leftovers.
Few kids liked lime cheesecake, which meant more for me, and I’ve always loved having dessert for breakfast the morning after my birthday. That tradition stuck with me. These days, a slice of cake the next morning is how I mark what I hope will be another sweet year ahead.
Finding Joy in this Simple Tradition
Now I keep it simple: red velvet every time. I like what I like, and on your birthday, you should get exactly what you want.
For me, that’s a dense, rich cake with fresh cream cheese frosting—big enough to share with the people I love and still have plenty left for breakfast. There’s a quiet joy in making something for yourself that also becomes something for everyone around you.
The Ritual Behind Baking Your Own Birthday Cake
At this point, making my own cake feels like a ritual. There’s something grounding about creating something with my own hands and sharing it with people who took the time to celebrate being on earth at the same time as me.
A friend from high school recently teased me about “doing witchcraft,” and I didn’t correct him. The habits I keep – baking my own cake, handwriting cards, cooking for people – are all a kind of quiet spellwork or ritual.
That’s what it’s all about: the little rituals and tiny spells that keep you close.
